HabsWorld.net -- 

Montreal Canadiens general manager Kent Hughes, announced late Thursday night that 32-year-old defenceman and Stanley Cup winner David Savard has been named captain of the Canadiens at least until the end of this season. During his post-game press conference, interim head coach Martin St-Louis confirmed the selection and said, “We needed a veteran to lead the way in our final games.” He then revealed Brendan Gallagher’s health was the reason he wasn’t chosen. The position was first offered to Joel Edmundson, but he insisted that Jeff Petry was his choice and while management and the players love Petry, his health made that choice problematic.

Hughes later said that Petry being on the trading block this coming summer also made that choice difficult. Hughes added, “Savard has won a Cup, has tons of experience, and even though I will try to trade him this summer I can assure you the interest is very low. He’s a great guy and outside of his criminal record he has shown a lot of maturity for years.” He then added while laughing, “Probably too many years.” The press corps joined in the laughter, but it certainly seemed disrespectful from this writer’s point of view.

David Savard spent six years in federal prison for criminal mischief. When he was twenty he grounded down the skates of the rival Granby Bison of the QMJHL and eleven Granby players suffered extreme career-ending injuries. Goaltender Jean Diefenbaker had his vocal cords slashed when a random skate flew across his face. While Diefenbaker had little hockey talent he was a promising Opera Singer and after the accident was forced to sing Country Western music. He is now a successful street singer in Old Montreal and is renowned for singing haunting, tortured Edith Piaf songs in the style of Johnny Cash.

Finally, Jeff Gorton came out and offered a few unexpected insights, “I love hockey. My whole life has been hockey. Hockey has been very, very good to me.” He then stared at us for a full minute before thankfully continuing, “The reason we chose David Savard was his last name, which happens to be Savard. There have been so many greats with the Habs named Savard; Serge Savard, Denis Savard, David Savard, and who can forget Curly Savard!”

While Gorton paused, lost in thought, I decided to Google Curly Savard. Now I made up this name because I thought it sounded funny, turns out I made up a real guy, a professional athlete. In 1920 the one hundred and twenty-pound boxer Curly Savard fought his first and last professional fight getting knocked out in the process and that is actually true!

Here’s hoping you all have or had a fun April Fools. David Savard has been playing well lately. He would deserve consideration for an interim captaincy of the team, but like his prison record, this whole story has been created for your amusement. Be well!!!!